Every Damn Time I Check My E-mail...

...There's something in the news on Yahoo! that jumps out at me. I open a few new tabs to read the info and then read the "news" "stories" after I've checked my e-mail. I can't wait until I get a newer Blackberry and can see all the pictures on an html e-mail. Then I can avoid getting sucked in. Stupid interesting entertainment news.

So here are the three stories that caught my eye. At least one isn't actually entertainment news.

1. Tiger Woods finally makes a big announcement
I wrote a post ten days ago because I was interested in the big announcement Tiger Woods was going to make. It was reported later that there was no big announcement and for people to stop listening to rumors.

You know what I think? I think there was an announcement. And I think the announcement was that he and his caddy are splitting. I just think they weren't ready for it to come out yet. And instead of being a douche and making an announcement about an announcement (I'm looking at you Donald Trump), he chose to simply wait until he was ready to spread the news.

I don't feel bad for his caddy, he's moving on to another successful golfer and he's a millionaire several times over thanks to Tiger. His life will probably be far less stressful starting tomorrow.


1. A Sinkhole? Can a natural disaster be called life imitating art?
Remind me never to go to Guatemala City. Jeez, it's normal for a giant perfectly cylindrical hole to open up in the ground? In your house? Under your bed? Um, no thanks. That sounds like a horror movie I'd never go see.

I am glad that her kids were okay though.


Kim Kardashian does something else I won't remember tomorrow.
The only reason I even paid-attention to this story is because it involved a look-alike. This has to be the third story this month Yahoo! put on their webpage about a damn Kim Kardashian look-alike. But hey, this one finally caught my eye.

It made me laugh because she's trying to sue Old Navy to get them to stop using a model she says looks to much like her.

So now I have questions: You're too good for Old Navy Kim? Why do you think they're using a model that looks like you? Why are you encouraging our already overly litigious society? Did you ever think that people know it's not you and don't care anyway?

As much crap as you promote, you'd think you'd want to be in an Old Navy commercial, at least their products aren't completely unhealthy. I'm just saying.

I really hope to have more rants about something that actually matters the next time I post.

I Can't WAIT To Hear What Tiger Woods Has To Say

Read the article on Golf.com about this.

I can't figure out why, but this has caught my attention. I read the short article a number of times since I first saw it on my way to work yesterday evening.

I have a ton of thoughts as to what he could be talking about.

1. Distancing himself from his drug smuggler friend.

2. Retiring.

3. Surgery announcement.

4. New wife.

5. Endorsement announcement.

6. Book coming out.

7. Still trying to repair his image.

8. Making some other random announcement I can't think of right now.

If you click the link above, you'll skip the CNN.com page and won't see the cute picture they have of him up. I can't help it, I find the slut puppy attractive, especially with the facial hair. I lurv me some facial hair.

But yes, if his announcement is even a little bit interesting, I will probably end up blogging about it, especially if it pisses me off

Dallas Beats Miami, Could Have Seen That Coming

I wish I could say I was surprised. I figured which team won depended on who had more to prove.

Miami really only had to prove that the move they made putting Wade, Bosh, and James all on one team was a good idea.

Dallas had to make up for a year of terrible sports. Texas does everything big and their history with football and baseball was just downright disappointing in the last 12 months.

Getting to where they were as a team was monumental for Dallas. Proving they could go all the way was a huge deal.

But for Miami, they beat Boston, and they beat #1 seed Chicago. They proved they could put together this dream team and whoop ass.

When it came down to it, Lebron really didn't play the game he needed to and that's why Miami lost.

I think everyone can agree James lost the series and Nowitzki won it. That's all there is to it.

Why I Shouldn't Rent A Car and Drive To Cleveland And Raise A Ruckus

The Bulls lost with the same crap that's been plaguing them all the Playoffs. They went from up by ever so many points to losing. I was at work, but I had the game cast in a corner of the screen. I watched as the score difference changed. I saw the mark where Derrick Rose missed some important shots. I saw Lebron and Dwayne making great shots when it was needed.

I know Derrick Rose is the MVP, but I hate that the Bulls can't win a game if he doesn't have a great 4th quarter. It just doesn't seem fair. I know Miami had more to prove.

But all I want to do is get in my car, drive to Cleveland, and raise a ruckus. Stupid Lebron James. But of course, Cleveland has enough problems.

They watched the game and saw the vigor with which he played. They know he wasn't doing that for them. Their chance at a ring was handed to Miami on a very expensive platter.

Plus, Miami didn't really outplay the Bulls until the end. The stats were all the Bulls favor until 4 min left in the game. So I must have a measured and accurate response. I'm sad my team is out, but it's their own fault.

At least I can have hope that this time next year, they will have worked out these kinks and will be doing better.

Otherwise, I'm renting a car and driving to Cleveland.

Chicago Bulls, What Can I Say?

I've no one to fuss at. I'm just sad. My Bulls lost Sunday night and therefore they are 2-1. If they don't win on Tuesday, they'll be 3-1. I can't imagine they'll come back from that. Stupid Lebron James. I used to love him before these playoffs started. That's all I have to say

Bulls vs. Miami

This is a hometown rant, so if you aren't a Bulls fan, you will not appreciate this.

Wanting to be 2-0
Was that so much to ask? Jeez guys, I just wanted to be 2-0. We're heading to certain loss in Miami on Sunday. All these guys had to do was win two games. And did they do it? No! They were tied and up and tied and down, and they couldn't keep it together at the end. You know who I blame? That brings me to the next section...

Boozer, You Suck!
It wasn't his fault exactly that they didn't win. But I'm still upset over the mess he's put me through the rest of the playoffs, so this is also his fault. He drives me so crazy that when I see Gibson's bald head doing something amazing in a crowd of defenders, my first reaction is wry appreciation cause his head looks like Boozer's head. Then I remind myself he's not Boozer, he's someone else altogether more wonderful and I can return to happy feelings.

Referees, What The Hell Did Thibodeau Ever Do To You?
Did he insult someone's mama? Was he a jerk in high school and an unbelievable amount of refs graduated with him? I don't know what it is, but a lot of calls seem to be unfair, and they happen when he is out in the trenches right on the side lines, getting the refs' attention. They can screw with him all they want, but they can't take away the fact that he coached up a team to #1 seed.

All that being said, I really am looking forward to this game. Foolish hometown pride won't let me fully concede that we'll probably lose. Yes, I'm one of those people that says "we" with no real affiliation with the team. Get over it.

NFL Woes

I love football. It's my favorite sport, by far. So one would think I was heartbroken over what's happening right now with the owners and the players. But I'm not.


If the players have a beef, it needs to be settled. I hear people often say that professional sports is one of the last forms of organized slavery. That may be a stretch considering that so man professional athletes are making 7 figures, but they do not have control over certain aspects of their lives.


I support taking control of a bad situation. That's why I was glad to see the names of two of my favorite quarterbacks (Drew Brees and Peyton Manning) on the list of those filing formal litigation since negotiations have fallen through.


Sure this season may not happen. While I'd love an 18-game season, giving me more time to kick butt in m fantasy football league, it will not be the end of the world if it comes a year later than originally planned.


I'm going to blame my anti-fat-cat sentiment for being on the side of someone other than the owners.